@ Friday, April 29, 2011
The feeling of detaching myself from the world hasn't gone, more like being used to it.
"It is all in the mind."
That's the thing I've been reminding myself. Feelings and emotions are just illusions which are factored by fear and sadness. My vision hasn't come back to my senses but I'm trying my best to put plans and plans ahead of me to keep me excited for life.
There isn't any long term goal, not any short term goal either.
More like a super short term goal which is almost half a month away from now.
Long sleeps makes me feel like I've been through a mini coma and waking up to a relief that I'm still alive, especially after a long dream in another dimension. The same old routine continues for weeks and months. Days pass too quickly. In just few weeks I will be blowing off another candle. Soon, counting down to each year is becoming a routine. Exaggerating, it is.
It has been two weeks I've not communicate with a person. Somehow, I feel happy when the figure increases each day. Glad or sad? More like a sad achievement. How ironic. I feel sad for myself for being that
pathetic. Some said following your intuition is the worst thing a person should do. I really have to agree with that after self destructing part of myself by following the useless heart.
It shouldn't meant to be.
Now, who should I follow when I can't trust my own heart and my mind isn't clear and right?
PS. If you still visit my blog, I would like to say thank you.